The Lord was showing me that if I don't actively hate this thing it will kill me. Even if it doesn't kill me physically it will kill me emotionally and spiritually. One of our favorite speakers put it best when he said "what you tolerate will dominate"..... I don't even want to tolerate this tumor one more day. I have to actively hate it every minute of every hour of every day.
Psalm 40:1,2 was a scripture the Lord gave me a while ago, way before this journey.
"I waited patiently for the Lord;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock and
gave me a firm place to stand."
The Lord said through a friend the other day "don't put up pictures in your pit, don't rearrange the furniture"... in other words don't get comfortable! Don't plan to stay in your pit. My pit is illness. I used to think it was also self pity, self justification and false humility, but the Lord showed me that those are my idols. I can't be rescued from the pit until I let go of my idols. When I refuse to be associated with this tumor anymore, when I refuse to receive anything from it, then I will have let go of my idols and I will be rescued.
Your pit may be something else. You may not think you are in a pit, but if there is any area of recurring defeat then you are in a pit. The good news is that you get to get out! The Lord has given you permission to be rescued.
One of our favorite pastors a man by the name of Graham Cooke introduced us to the idea of something he calls "crafted prayers". The idea is that the Word of God says that when we ask anything according to the will of God, He will do it for us when we ask with faith. That is a pretty amazing statement. So the principle is that you spend time finding out what His heart is for your particular situation and once you get it then you craft a prayer around that and then pray it! Pray it not just once, but over and over and over again until it comes about. Once you know what His heart is for you and you begin praying it, it is a recipe for total and complete success.
So.... I am going to end this post with sharing my crafted prayer with all of you. My prayer is a combination of some things the Lord has spoken to me in my quiet times, prophesies that have been spoken over me by other people and many of them confirmed over and over again by many individuals. Some of them have been so beyond me that I find it impossible to wrap my brain around, but nonetheless I believe them because He has said them. If you feel lead I would love you to pray it over me whenever the Lord leads you... I think that would bless His heart and it would certainly bless me! Thank you.
Heather's crafted prayer
Thank you Lord that you have named yourself "my healer"
and that you are rescuing me from the slimy pit
of illness.
I declare that I will not cling to the idols of self pity,
self justification or false humility.
I receive the key of honor that you have given me and
I will draw near in intimacy with you in the
garden of my heart.
I rejoice that I am pregnant with life
and ready to give birth.
I thank you that everyone who witnesses my miracle
and hears my story will see and fear you
and put their trust in you.
May You be glorified in me.
Amen.
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