Sugar and Spice and Everything nice....

We are so happy to announce that our newest member due to arrive in March is going to be a beautiful baby girl. We are so excited.

While I was ready for another boy (which would have been a wonderful blessing, I adore my boys) my husband was sure this one was a girl and he is reveling in the fact that he was right.

Sometimes when you face a season of one disappointment after another it doesn't seem real when there is finally joy without measure. We have had to make a decision several times to agree with the joy of the season and not try to put a damper on it in any way. It's just joyful, joy upon joy!

Amazing

So the boys are getting used to the idea as well. Ethan was sure he wanted another brother, to keep the boys dominant in our family, but he has a twinkle in his eye when he thinks of all the ways she will adore and look up to him and Micah. Micah is sure we need to buy every pink girly toy we see right now.... when I assure him she won't be here for a while, and when she does get here it will be a while until she plays with toys he isn't quite ready for the wait.

We are still trying to settle on a name, but I think this time is different because there are so many that we do like. I guess we may just have to wait until we meet her to know who she really is.

One of my girlfriends put it best when she rejoiced with us and said "Beauty for Ashes".

Indeed!

In love with fall!!

Here we are at the beginning of fall and I am soo happy. I heard that fall in Central Oregon can be crazy, but I had no idea! Yesterday was 70 something and hazy from a near by fire, but today is lower 50's and hailing!!! Wow, here comes winter? or maybe this is fall....

Whatever it is I love it. Sunday was my amazing Ethan's 8th birthday. He celebrated and celebrated and celebrated some more. I love that my son has such a healthy self image. He really loves celebrating himself. So much like his mommy :o) It was also the anniversary of my original MRI and diagnosis of the brain tumor. To see how far we had come in 2 years, from devastation, having our feet knocked out from underneath us and not knowing what the future would hold, to a brand new start, a baby on the way and more joy than we thought possible. Amazing, simply amazing.

So much has happened in the last month since my previous post. I'll try to sum it all up.

• Ethan started 2nd grade in the public school system. Except for one day of tears, he is in heaven, absolutely LOVES school. We prayed that the Lord would give him the best teacher, and He certainly did! Mrs. Lence has been an answer to prayer in everyway for our Ethan.
• Daniel's cousin Paul got married. What a happy occasion that brought great great joy to all of the family. Paul married Fenny a wonderful woman from our church here in Bend. With the happy occasion brought lots of family.
• Which leads me here, Daniel's family all came in for the wedding. His parents were here along with his brother and family. We had a very very full house, but it was amazing. So much fun to finally meet Levi, the young man Neal and Diane (Daniel's parents) are foster caring for, and to finally meet Jon and Cyndi's twins. Justice and Jaxon are almost 8 months old and just a ton of fun.
• Micah and I began homeschooling again. He is doing just wonderfully.
• Daniel and Dad are still painting houses, even though work has slowed, God is so faithful and we are seeing amazing answers to prayer in our finances every single month.
• Had our second and third Dr. appointments. Saw the baby on the ultrasound, lots of wiggling and moving and then heard the heartbeat nice and strong. I'm beginning to feel movement and the majority of the morning sickness is over!!! God is so good.

So on we go with a new season literally. Looking forward to fall and all the joy this season brings. Praying your family finds great joy in this season as well.

First glance

We had our first glimpse of our little bundle this week. I was thrilled because Daniel got to be there and when they put the monitor on my belly to take a peek the baby just started dancing around. He/She moved almost the whole time she was monitoring... something I hadn't see with my other two. We just might have a wild child on our hands, at least a groove machine.

My morning sickness has been unrelenting. It "switched" off with my others at 12 weeks, but here we are almost to week 13 and I am still dealing with quite a bit of nausea all day long. It's been 6 very long weeks and I can't wait till this part is over. Seeing the baby was so helpful though because it really does give you a visual for all the problems that I'm having to endure. Soon we'll be able to feel the movement and I love that stage.

Our lives are constantly changing and "morphing" it's exciting but exhausting too. We've decided to put Ethan in public school for the first time this year. He is so thrilled and so am I. He is going into 2nd grade and he really thrives on interaction with others, I just know this setting will be perfect for him. I will have Micah home with me again this year and I'm looking forward to some one on one time with him that we've never really had. So in two weeks we'll be sending Ethan off and beginning a new school year.

Daniel's cousin Paul also gets married in about 2 weeks so we have a bunch of family coming in for that amazing event which is such a thrill. We'll have a very full house for a few days, but there is nothing more fun.

And to top it all off Fall is in the air, my favorite time of year. We are just counting all of our many amazing blessings, ones that seemed lightyears away this time last year. It's amazing how God truly does make all things beautiful in His time!!

We're grateful to be on the beautiful side of things now.

Good news

Well here we are in August already and I'm realizing how long it's been since I last posted.

We are pregnant again and life is good. All the signs are good. I'm tremendously sick with morning sickness that lasts all day long, which I wasn't with any of the miscarriages. The boys are so excited for their new brother or sister and are enjoying tracking the progress of the baby's growth on the internet.

I had my first Doctor appt. yesterday. It was just preliminary to establish care, we didn't get any information on the baby, but at the end of the month we will have another appointment that will give us the opportunity to see and hear the heartbeat.

The due date is March 8, my birthday.... very fun.

Joy is returning in measure to us all and we are just thrilled!

Good sign

I wanted to update everyone who is praying for us especially. I got a call from my Dr.'s office yesterday. They received the labs back from my blood test. Everything looks very very very normal! I didn't know how much I really wanted to be normal until I wasn't for so long, and now, the word normal sounds amazing.

Daniel and I are just rejoicing because when you have something like a brain tumor and they tell you it could come back and then you have headaches and achy eyes every little thing kind of makes your heart jump and you begin wondering if things are getting bad again. Sooo, to get a blood test and have them test all the hormones produced by the pituitary and have it come back totally normal is such a relief. We are so excited.

Thank you all for praying for us and holding up our arms thru all this. Looking forward to more victories to come.

Growing up

This is a particularly exciting weekend for us. Last night we celebrated the graduation of Ethan from 1st grade and Micah from Kindergarten. Our tradition is to go bowling for their party and we had a great time. Micah outscored all of us... something he was quite thrilled about. 

Homeschooling has been so rewarding. To look at my kids and see the progress they have made from this time last year is astounding. In so many ways they are little sponges that soak up whatever you give them to learn. But with teaching our kids the progress is line upon line and precept upon precept so it isn't always measurable, but then when you finish a whole year and look back there is much satisfaction in what has been accomplished.

We are praying and asking the Lord for wisdom for next year. I want to homeschool but am asking the Lord what He has for my kids. For now I'm super happy to not have to do school everyday. I'm ready for a break.

Our second celebration is Micah. He turns 6 on Monday!!! I can hardly believe he is 6. He is such a joy. Hungry for knowledge, loves to learn, is compassionate at his core and the most devoted little guy I've ever met. He is still in love with his VeggieTales, at this point he claims he will love them until he is a daddy and can pass the love on to his children. I hope he isn't disappointed :o)

We are so blessed to have two amazingly healthy boys that are great buddies. It's times like these that I feel like I'm overflowing with gifts from the Lord. So so good to me!

Only He knows and that's ok.

Romans 15:13 

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

I think we have already established the true meaning of hope but let me remind anyone who forgot or hasn't heard......

HOPE is the JOYFUL anticipation of GOOD

Now I'm reminding you as well as me because living on earth usually means we get curve balls thrown our way and we have to remember that it isn't the end of the world, but it can become something beautiful if we let Him use it.

John 16:33

"....I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

With that in mind we read the scripture again.... He is the God of hope (the joyful anticipation of good) and he wants to fill me with joy and peace (the first two things to go when crisis hits) because as we trust in him (picture yourself standing under the downpour of His hope getting filled up with joy and peace, trust keeps you there, fear takes you away from there) but if you stay there long enough you will OVERFLOW with what..... HOPE!!!! (the joyful anticipation of good) Amazing!!! 

It's like this awesome cycle of going to the source of hope and all good things and saying "wow, I sure need some hope, things look bleak" and he says, "here stand under my downpour for a bit, you'll get some joy and some peace" and you say "I don't need joy or peace, I need hope! I told you things look stinkin bleak!!!" and he says "relax, this will work I promise, you just have stay there for a while" So you decide to try it out and sure enough as soon as you step under that downpour you've got all this joy and peace and you forget about the circumstances that are screaming at you to freak out and give up..... Pretty soon before you know it you are overflowing with hope, the very thing you were looking for, and when you come out your situation always looks different.

The Lord downloaded this scripture to me this morning. I needed it. We had a doozy of a week.

Actually it started last week. Our housing hunt ended for various reasons, all out of our control. We have so much peace though. We thought we'd look for a house and pursue it as far as we could, but we hit a closed door and so we stop and instead of trying to make something happen that isn't supposed to happen we step back and say, "ok, we know you've got something awesome for us, just bring it in your timing"

We got hope.

Then Monday hit. I started spotting. The familiar scenario that left my heart sick. It's happened two times before and I knew exactly what was happening. Daniel and I prayed and waited, but Tuesday I lost the baby.

I was numb.

In fact I stayed numb for a few days, I had to in order to still function as a mom to my two other guys. I went thru the motions, did what I needed to do, but I just couldn't believe it happened again. I thought we had left all this heartache stuff back in California. This was our new land, our promised land, not that everything would be fairy-tale-ish, but we thought at least things would improve....

Wednesday my sister in law came and got the boys. I didn't think I needed a break, I'm ok, I'm dealing with it, strong.... when they left I just stopped, breathed and cried. I couldn't believe another baby was gone. 

Daniel and I took advantage of the time. We went on a much needed date to Baja Fresh, one of our favorites. We cried together, we went to the top of the hill in the middle of Bend called Pilot Butte. It was a beautiful evening and watched a storm roll in, complete with thunder and lightning, it was awesome. We cried and prayed some more. Emptied out. It literally downpoured on us while we were out there. We came home and read all the promises the Lord has given us over the years. We keep a journal of the specific promises he gives us either thru our personal times with him or from other people. You can't believe what a strength that is in times like these. 

Had all day Thursday to myself, another date night with my hubby, this time at home watching Return of the King, the third movie of the Lord of the Rings series. It was amazing. Then we had a quiet day home together today, just resting, worshipping, and enjoying the peace and joy of his downpour. I thought it was interesting that it literally downpoured here the last 3 days. First time it's done that since we moved here. It was magnificent.

This morning was when the Lord spoke to me thru the scripture in Romans. It is always a choice though. Choosing to allow him to fill us and give us a piece of him as the God of hope. Or staying in self pity and depression and wasting so much of what he is giving away freely. I choose life, and I choose hope.

We have hope again. It feels amazing.

God makes all things beautiful in it's time.

I waited paitently for the Lord and He inclined to me, and heard my cry. 

He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, 

Out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps. 

He has put a new song in my mouth - praise to our God; 

Many will see it and fear, and put their trust in the Lord. 

Psalm 40: 1-3

The Lord gave me this scripture several years ago when we were here on vacation praying about a possible move here for a pastor position. I was basically begging God to say "yes" so I wouldn't have to go back to Santa Ynez. He gave me this scripture and I just saw myself up to my waist in the miry clay and asking the Lord how he was going to free me.

Over the years and months I've gone back to that scripture and prayed it back to the Lord. Everytime I see myself in that horrible pit and unable to free myself but just proclaiming that I won't be there forever, somehow, someday I will be out of the horrible pit, but practicing singing that new song so that I don't stay stuck.

This morning I read that amazing Psalm and for the first time in 4 years since I got that scripture I realized I was reading it on the other side. I was reading it with my feet firmly planted on the rock, with a new song in my mouth!!! Oh it felt so amazing.

We have reached some major milestones here in Bend. 

1- We've been pre-approved for  a home loan so we can begin looking for that house of our dreams for the first time in our married lives.

2- We are enjoying the weather, friends, family and home the Lord has blessed us with.

3- This week we found out we are pregnant with baby #3.

This last one was especially pivotal for us because we have been wanting another baby for many many years. Our youngest Micah will be 6 in a few weeks and since his birth we have had two devastating miscarriages and then countless disappointments with the tumor rendering my body unable to get pregnant. In fact at one of my appointments before surgery my endocrinologist said that he wasn't even sure that I would ever be able to conceive. After that Dr. appointment I was sitting in the waiting room and just breaking off those words, declaring that the Lord has made my womb fruitful and I looked at my phone and the date was 11-11-08 and it was 11:11am. I asked the Lord for the significance and He told me to look up Hebrews 11:11 So I did. It said "Abraham..... considered Him faithful who made the promise" Then the Lord said "you can't listen to the limited knowledge of the Dr. you have to listen to what I say because I am outside of time and I know today from tomorrow". 

So here we are. We've come full circle. The amazing thing is I have no sign of any kind of morning sickness, and I'm full of energy, all of which is miraculous. 

The fact that the Lord would redeem this week for my family the week that my dad was diagnosed with cancer 3 years ago... turning our mourning into dancing, our weeping into laughter.

We are rejoicing.

What a year

It was one year ago that I began this blog... what a year!!!

My Lord is so good to us and we are forever grateful for this past year, but I'm especially grateful that IT'S OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

My dad was diagnosed with cancer 3 years ago this week.

Now he is cancer free and pain free!!!

He works more than full time 

He and mom bought a beautiful home this year. 

My mom's birthday is Sunday.

She has been such a strength to all of us who have fallen apart around her

She stays very busy with grandchildren and children

She is loving her new home.

God is soo good. Our family has so much to be grateful.

Life is ever changing

Well, life continues to be one dynamic change after another. We've been loving Oregon. It feels like home. It has been so much like home that we have gotten busy and had a hard time writing updates here. So here is a rare moment of peace where I will try to update our lives.

- School is almost over we have 3 more weeks of homeschooling and then we will be done for the summer. Ethan is looking forward to being in "public" school next year. We are praying for the right school with the perfect teacher for his needs and the best surroundings. My mama's heart doesn't want to send him off, but he is sooo ready to be with friends, to learn from another voice and to be in a school setting. I'm excited but sad. I will keep Micah home for another year of homeschooling.  Looking forward to some one on one with him.

-We've been pre-approved for a home loan. We are super excited about this because the housing market is so amazing that we could actually get into a home and have the mortgage payment be less that our rent payment is right now. We are actively searching for the perfect place. Praying for lots of wisdom.

- Daniel is leading worship a few times a month at church and also teaching the harp and bowl model to the church every other Friday night. I've never seen him so alive. He is such a gifted teacher and when it is on something he is passionate about like worship, he just soars.

- We are looking forward to a trip to Seattle in June for a family wedding and seeing lots of family and friends up there. We are really looking forward to seeing Jon and Cyndi (Daniel's brother and wife) along with there boys which include our new twin nephews. 

- We've been loving our new church family. So many amazing people we are enjoying getting to know. Had lots of dinner invitations and just enjoying a healthy church family. Our pastors are amazing and truly spiritual parents.

We will try to update more often, but for now we are just enjoying life to the fullest.

Family

I have to say the best thing about living in Oregon is being near family. This is my family.... our crazy picture. It's tradition to take a crazy picture as well as a good one when we do these photo shoots. This was taken last Sunday and usually when we take them it is because we are only here for a few days and then are heading back to sunny Cali. and we have to get the picture, but this time it was a much much happier day. My brother Peter and family were here for the weekend and were visiting us! 

We love it here. Last week it was 80 degrees and beautiful... today it snowed. God was showing me how He is so surprising just like the weather of Central Oregon. It's all good, it's all needed, the snow, the rain, the sun, but it's all so unpredictable.  I love it!

I have to admit, I'm rather ready for the sun to come out and stay out and for the snow to be put away until next winter, but for now it is an adventure.

We are pursuing a couple of things and would love prayer. We are really considering buying a house and need favor as well as wisdom for that crazy adventure. The housing market is incredible right now and we are in a place that this would be a wise decision, just one we've never done before so it leaves us quite overwhelmed.

We are also making decisions concerning our next school year for the boys, the House of Prayer we are called to start here as well as other major decisions... all of them good for once. It feels so good to have all this anticipation and it is all exciting. 

We'll keep you all posted!!!

Pink eye!!!

So my poor Ethan woke up a couple of mornings ago sick. I thought it was just a nasty cold or the flu but its mutated into pink eye. Although he feels mostly good he looks like he lost a fight with a heavy weight.

Anyway, desperate to get a remedy and not wanting to take him to the Dr. mostly because I just heard a few weeks ago about how European countries treat pink eye like a cold and we Americans treat it like the plague, I thought I'd calmly go about trying to remedy the situation.

I'm blogging at this early hour on a Tuesday because I was laughing so hard I had to share it....

For a good laugh go to your google browser and type in "natural remedy for pink eye". Some of the suggestions we legit and totally could work, I'm looking forward to trying them today, but some of them were hilarious!!! This particular website has people write in and give their experience and remedy and then people and say if it helped them or not. A lot of them were things like salt water, green tea bags, breast milk...... you know weird natural things that people might have (although we are fresh out of breast milk around here). My humor was engaged though at a couple of entries. One was from a guy who claims duct tape worked for him..... go figure! Another was from an "energy healer" who gets chronic pink eye and "visualizes" the pink eye burning up. This person claims you have to close your eyes and picture you eye ball catching on fire, but it isn't the eye ball that is on fire, just the infection (nice of them to clarify that one) and then picture different colors etc.

Great for a laugh if anyone wants one :o) 

It is slooooowly turning into spring here. We had a beautiful 70+ degree day last week and were dreamily soaking it in as there is no place more beautiful than Central Oregon in that kind of weather, and then yesterday it turned cold again and was spitting snow. I guess this is normal, but it leaves a person feeling a bit perplexed. I'm ready for spring!!!

It's a new day

So, it's a brand new day. I wanted to share my news with the world. I got my ring back from the jewelers today and it is stunning!!!! It was a bit more $ than we thought it would cost, but he sized it, put it back together and polished and cleaned it and it looks like it did 10 years ago when my sweet husband asked me to marry him.

The most important thing is that ..... IT FITS!!!!!!!!!!! The boys were with me when I picked it up and they wanted to take turns putting it on and pulling it off. They loved it, and so did I. It's actually a bit big because my finger is so small down where it sits from all the months where it was squeezed onto my finger, but I'm just thrilled that it's back and looks so beautiful.

We just spent 3 days at the Oregon coast with my sister in law Tricia and her 2 foster kids and my mom. It was really nice to get a break from the routine of life and to bond a bit more with her and the kids.

We are so excited about what is next for us, although we don't know all that is in store, we do know that it's good whatever it is! God is amazingly good.

The Promised Land

I feel a little silly using that title, but that is what we felt the Lord say when we left California, that we were leaving the desert and entering the Promised Land. So here we are and as of today we've been here almost exactly one month. We left SY exactly a month ago today and boy o boy am I glad it is today and not a month ago!!!

So, what has happened to us in one month? 

Well, much in every way. We are officially settled. 

We have our own home. We lived with mom and dad for 2 weeks before they moved out and bought their own home. We are living in their old rental. Renting from a wonderful and generous lady who is so kind. She even installed a new dishwasher for us! (I've never had a brand new dishwasher and it is heavenly)

The boys LOVE their new home and friends. They get to play like I remember playing when I was a little girl. Ethan just ran in a couple minutes ago with a live fish he caught in a canal in our neighborhood. He was so happy it was still alive when he got it inside. He even forgets to eat when he is playing.... a first for my boys! It is soo good for my heart to see my boys loving life, living carefree like I did when I was little.

Daniel and I both passed our written exam and now are proud owners of Oregon drivers licenses again. Our car even has an Oregon license plate (so we don't get nasty looks for being Californians). 

Daniel has lead worship several times at our new church Desert Streams. We love the people, a lot of young families and the church has about 50 children!!! The kids love it to say the least!

Daniel and I met with a group of 6 other couples last week for our first official House of prayer meeting. The meeting was so amazing because it wasn't just our church there were 4 other churches represented at this meeting, all of them were hungry to see a 24/7 house of prayer started here in Bend. We worshipped together, prayed together and each of us commented how we sensed the presence of the Lord like we hadn't felt before. It was so fun.

My body has fully returned to normal. Something I am celebrating with great joy. I took my ring in today to get it fixed from having to have it cut off for surgery. I've been without it for 2 months now and have felt quite naked without it, although I'm also happy to not have it stuck anymore. I tried the rings on in the jewelers shop to see what size I needed to be and before surgery I was a size 8. My hand is totally back to normal. The size 8 ring fit perfectly! It was such a thrill to pull it on and off my finger! Looking forward to having my rings back.

The weather has been cold but breathtakingly beautiful. We love it here. Daniel got to have about 3 weeks off before the work started rolling in. He is working with my dad painting houses. They worked 1/2  a week this week and are booked from here on out! Amazing how the Lord brought about a great rest for all of us to get established and now he is saying, it's time to work! We are thrilled. 

For me personally it's been a month of mourning. Even though I've been thrilled by all the newness of our life here, I have found myself grieving quite a lot this month. Today it lifted. Like a heavy blanket lifting off of me and the Lord said "The past is the past, no more grieving, it's time to face the future with joy". 

So here we are, a new day, a new season, a new land and we are FULL of Joyful anticipation. 

We made it

Oh my, where do I begin. Our last week has felt like a month. I'm trying to figure out how to share about all the happenings, literally too much to share here, but I'll hit the highlights of our week.

So after our few days of travel to and from Arizona we got started packing up the truck. Daniel and his cousin Paul packed up our 17 foot truck and it was stuffed!!! We couldn't have done it without Paul. He was the mastermind of efficient packing. So late Thursday we finished packing the truck and then Friday we worked our back ends off cleaning the house, carpets and finishing the packing. Wow, we were exhausted!

Early Saturday we headed out. Saying goodbye to Daniel's parents was excruciating and also leaving our neighbors, ones we have poured our lives into. As we drove thru the Valley early that morning for the last time we were feeling a bit numb, quite overwhelmed and totally exhausted. I hadn't slept much the night before and by the time we were an hour up the road I needed a nap! Thankfully caffeine was invented and it was my salvation that day.

Daniel was driving the truck and I was following in the car. We drove up to Redding that day, a drive that normally takes us 7 hours ended up taking us 10 hours. The last hour it poured rain and I had to fight my cars desire to hydroplane. Very scary. As we arrived we had difficulty getting a room at a hotel, so as that drama progressed we slowly felt our patience and peace ebb away. Finally after about an hour of drama we had our room and we have never been that exhausted. 

We went to sleep early but I woke up after 2 hours of peaceful slumber and couldn't go back to sleep the whole night!!! By the time Sunday morning arrived we were still exhausted and the weather was horrible. They had closed the pass if you didn't have chains, unfortunately we didn't have we would have to spend our gas money to get them and the banks were closed because of the extended holiday weekend! We were literally stuck!!!! Thankfully my parents encouraged us to stay put for another day. It was a great place to get stranded. We got to go to our favorite church there and really got ministered to at Bethel. The boys loved the Disney channel at the hotel and it was nice to hunker down and rest for a day.

By the next morning we had had amazing sleep and were ready to take on the roads. The road officials lifted the chain restriction and we were able to slip thru over the pass between storms. We had dry roads the after about 2 hours and no snow. We ended up getting a flat tire about a half hour outside of Bend. It was another blessing though because we were right by a city and were able to change to our spare, get air in it and then limp into Bend. If the tire had blown anywhere else we would have been stranded for another night!

We felt the hand of God all the way thru. Some have said, "wow, are you sure you were supposed to go? maybe this was God's way of telling you you should have stayed put" but I look at it differently. I believe that any change takes some struggle. The Bible says that we will have trials of many kinds but the Lord gives us the ability to overcome them all! We were worshipping him and just so grateful that he guided us here safely. Our gas money was exact, not too much, and not too little. We were safe and we have so much to be grateful for. 

Daniel is going to be doing work with my dad. As much as he can. The boys are so happy to be near cousins and have done a lot of playing with them already. We are getting used to calling this home, something that still seems surreal. 

Thank you all for praying for us as we've made this transition. One thing we've been so grateful about is the Lord has given us divine health, not so much a sniffle or sneeze, we've been totally healthy and that has been amazing for us! 

Crazy week continues

Here we are, it's Thursday morning and we are exhausted, happy and the craziness continues.

Our trip to Arizona went well. We left Monday morning and it was POURING rain the whole way!!!! All except about 3 hours in the middle it rained, even in the desert! There were a few things we noticed about Arizona. 

#1 - the line between California and Arizona is also the line where the cactus's grow! Weird! The terrain looked the same but as soon as passed into Arizona we started seeing cactus, on the cali. side there weren't any!!! 

#2 - Mesa is a lot further away than mapquest says it is. Like 2 hours further.... grrrrrwrwufuid.

#3 - We are praying God never EVER calls us to Arizona! At least not to the Phoenix area! UGLY!

So after a very nice, but short visit with Daniel's grandparents we jumped back in the car for 4 hours on Tuesday to get back to California. On Wednesday we went to Knotts Berry Farm. We had soo much fun. The boys were brave on the first ride, (we kind of tricked them into a roller coaster ride) but that was the last one of the day for Micah. He had fun but he didn't want to do anything even remotely scary after that. Ethan wanted to do that roller coaster again but wouldn't do another one.... despite that fact we had a great day. We felt bad for Ethan because he was 2 inches too tall for some of the rides in the snoopy camp section. Poor guy, so young, but so big. He was a trooper though. We did a lot of "carnival rides" like the bumper cars (3 times) and the little train ride, but we had fun. 

We left the park around 6pm and grabbed some dinner to go and after the boys ate they were instantly aspleep. They slept from about 6:30pm to 5:45am this morning. I suppose that is good, but it came too early this morning. It was soo good to be in our own bed last night, after 2 nights in a hotel! Ugh.

Today we make all the craziness of our house a bit more sane. Daniel gets the truck today at 11am and then we begin the packing. We will try to load everything but the mattresses today and then tomorrow we clean all day! We head out early Saturday. 

So excited, pray for grace for the boys. They are soo excited, they are a great age because they are mostly oblivious to the sad stuff, but totally excited about the fun stuff. They are sleeping great, except for the early mornings. 

Next time we blog will be in Oregon. Thanks for praying for us.

Quick note

It's late and we've had a crazy weekend and are heading to bed soon, but I realized I'm not sure when I'm going to be near a computer or have time to update in the next week so I thought I'd take a second to do that now.

Our weekend was very very wet, but we live among die hard yard salers so we ended up having our moving sale anyway and made over $200! We were thrilled. So we are grateful that is over with, amazed at the junk people buy and the fact that all the "good stuff" that was worth money didn't sell. 

Today was also our last day at church here in Santa Ynez. Wow, what a deal it was to say goodbye to all the dear ones we have stood with, loved on, laughed with, cried with for over 9 years. It was very emotional. Some we have buried their loved ones and cried with them. Others we have prayed for every week for physical healing. Still others we have ministered with, gone on youth trips with. They have let us try out crazy ideas for ministry on them, and they've loved us thru it. It is impossible to put into words the love we have for this tough and feisty group of people. 9 years is a long time and we are thrilled to call them family.

After a quick trip to Santa Barbara (just over the hill) this evening for dinner with Daniel's parents we are home. Daniel's mom Diane had double knee replacement surgery this last week and so they are staying down there for a few days in a rehabilitation place where she is literally having to re-learn  how to walk. She is a tough lady! The doctors are thrilled with her progress though and can't believe how quickly she is healing. Praise the Lord.

We head out to Arizona early in the morning to see Daniel's grandparents. They live in Mesa and we haven't seen them in a while. We are looking forward to that visit. We will head back this way on Tues. night and hit Knott's Berry Farm on Wednesday for some much needed fun time with our boys. They have been major troopers thru this season and are so excited to be going, but we really wanted to play too.

Some great answers to prayer in the last few days! We have a place to live. My parents bought a house so the rental they are in right now (a 2 bedroom approx. 1500 sq. foot home) is available and the landlady said she would gladly rent to us. It is such a blessing because we won't need all the extra money other places need like 2 months of rent or a cleaning deposit etc. Plus the added bonus of a familiar home for the boys is greatly appreciated. Such a relief to know where we will be living once we get there. For those of you who don't have that address it is :

61510 Maid Maria Ct.

Bend, OR 97702

and yes, that is Maid Marian as in Robin Hood. We are living in Nottingham Square housing development :o)

Soo. Here we go. Please pray for us this week. Once we get home on Wed. night we will get the UHaul on Thurs. morning, pack it up, clean on Fri. and then head out early Sat. morning. We plan to stop in Redding on Sat. night and arrive in Bend sometime on Sunday. 

The week promises to be very very busy but exciting. 

Main prayer requests are for safety as we travel, perfect working order of the cars, Health (so far we are all very healthy, please pray that continues), grace for Neal and Diane. They will be coming home to an empty house and that could be quite a shock even though they are prepared for it. Please also pray that they will find someone quickly to rent our part of the house. 

We will update as we can, until then we thank you for your prayers and love.

Here we go!

Everyday

It's like everyday some new information comes in or some "kink" in our plans.... I have to keep reminding myself that God knows the beginning from the end and this is his idea not ours. 

Today is Daniel's last day of work. In fact he's got 2 more hours and I'm sure he is beside himself with excitement. His job has been a blessing for 7+ years, but now it is time to move on and boy is he ready. However, when you quit a job that means no paycheck so the excitement is tempered with a bit of trepedition and wonder.

We planned a garage sale this weekend, but it's raining cats and dogs.... something it rarely does here. So we smile and say, "Wow God, really? rain? go figure!" We are getting our car serviced and of course it is going to cost us more than it ever has because it is in need of replacement parts that just happened to be time to change.... go figure!

More waiting, more wondering, more surprises. Being peaceful in the midst of the storm and letting God navigate us thru..

Another update

Went to the Doctor on Thursday. I've hesitated updating because it was very non eventful. I suppose that is good. Little frustrating, 7 hours, 40+ dollars and tons of energy just to have the surgeon sit and say, "well, you look great, have a nice day." So, basically there isn't anything more they need to see me for unless I have a question.

So now we get ready to move. 

Daniel finishes his final week of work this next week.

We have the mother of all garage sales because it is worth more to sell our stuff than to pay to get it up to Oregon....  

We say goodbye to everyone we love here... quite a feat.

We go to Arizona for a couple days

We try to hit Disneyland

All in two weeks.

Going to be quite and adventure!

Miracles.

We've had a very full week.... as you can imagine. Yesterday Daniel's brother Jon and his beautiful wife Cyndi gave birth to twin boys. The boys arrived 10 weeks early but are now stable and supposed to do just fine. They were each 3 lbs. but need to be in the hospital from 5 - 8 weeks. Please pray for their finances to support this unexpected surprise and blessing. 

We got our bill in the mail on Saturday from my surgery. We were surprised how quickly they billed us... I suppose we shouldn't be. Anyway. As we opened it and tried to decipher it we saw that the two bills together equaled over $50,000! Whew! That is just a little over 48 hours of  care! Unbelieveable. Even better than that however is that we don't own one cent!!! Our insurance covers every single penny! Total miracle! We are beyond thrilled.

It truly does seem to pour when it rains. We feel like we are standing here with mouths hanging open just staring and watching the Lord do what He loves to do best.... take care of His kids. There are so many things that the Lord has put together that we never imagined, too numerous to name each... we just continue to be in awe.

Daniel is finishing his final two weeks of work now and finding great favor with his bosses and co workers. Everyone is so sad to see him go. 

I am headed to the surgeons for a final check up on Thursday. 

We've spotted the light at the end of the tunnel!

100%

Wow, we are exactly two weeks from surgery and I can say that today I am 100%!!!!!!! Amazing. I have more energy than I have had in years, no more horrible thirst, no pain whatsoever and my stuffy nose is completely gone!!! I am beyond thrilled. Everyday we just praise the Lord for his amazing goodness.

Now we are packing, packing, packing. We've got lots to do but we are confident in the Lord's ability to provide every step of the way. Still looking for house and major source of income, but again we don't feel stressed, just curious as to what exactly the Lord is up to.

Daniel went back to work yesterday and he is thrilled to be 3 weeks out from being done there. We are kicking it into high gear. Thank you for praying for us, we are joyfully anticipating good things.

Progress

We are making progress. The week has been so wonderful, having Daniel home with us. It has helped tremendously. I had a great week of progress. I am now about 95% of what I can remember being before all this. Thursday we went down to LA and basically spent all day there taking a blood / urine test to test me for diabetes insipidous and make sure all was progressing on schedule. Then I had to wait for the doc. appt. We took the boys and made a day of it which was good and hard because there really isn't much that would interest kids in downtown LA.... They were pretty bored, but troopers. 

Saw the doc. and he gave me the ok (of course) that everything was better than ok. So I have one more visit in 2 weeks which should be easier because there is no blood draw and no wait, and then we will have the all clear :o)

I got way overtired on Thursday from the drive and the hectic-ness of the day that my body freaked out a bit yesterday and I needed to rest a bit more than normal. I have been incredibly thirsty and thus having more water in my system and so the fear of diabetes insipidous tried to creap in, but it was just my body reacting to the stressful day and now I'm more rested and it has calmed down quite a bit.

Please pray that I will have the patience to heal properly especially in these next 3 days before Daniel returns to work..... I want to be as close to 100% by the time he goes back.

Also we've been trying to figure out the housing situation in Bend.... do we buy right away, rent right away, stay with mom and dad..... we just need wisdom. As we've been trying different doors we have been getting some wisdom, but we just need more confirmation. 

As we look ahead to our move it all seems pretty simple compared to this last season, but as it gets closer it seems more and more overwhelming. Pray that we stay out of the "overwhelmed" stage.

New Day

We are great. I told Daniel this morning that there aren't many people that can have the experience I have had. In one year I felt like I aged 15 - 20 years. My face changed so much, it got difficult to try to look beautiful, especially toward the end, my eyes got puffy, the lines underneath were deep and my nose and forehead had grown. In the 5 or 6 days since surgery I have decreased in age about 20 years!!!!!  It has been astounding. I hadn't put any makeup on for about 4 days and then yesterday I did my hair and put my makeup on and I was shocked! When I walked out of the bathroom Daniel just stared at me. He was amazed at how much I had changed and how quickly I had changed back!!! 

My parents left today and they did so much to help us get started in the moving process. They cleaned appliances, and windows and all kinds of things that would have taken me days and days to do. Now we are moving ahead with our next adventure. We are planning on being out of Santa Ynez and moved by Valentine's weekend which is just 5 weeks away!!!

I have a follow up appointment this Thursday and then another one in 2 weeks and then we are done!!! I feel amazing. Still need to do more resting than usual, but my nose is finally clearing out and I can breath thru it, it is still draining a bit, but it's expected to do that for 2 weeks from surgery. I have felt a challenge to my equilibrium a bit because of the ears being affected by the sinus stuff.... All in all I am sooo happy and unbelievably relieved that this season is over. 

We are marveling at the Lord's goodness and His divine instruction in resting, waiting, and the timing of surgery and moving and insurance.... too much for us to have planned ourselves. Looking at it from the vantage point it has truly been a dance!!!

Please keep us in prayer. We have lots to do and wrap up here in the next few weeks and we are planning to buy a house in Bend, something we have never done before. All of that is quite overwhelming, but considering the thing we just weathered, not something we are afraid of. We know the Lord will dance with us all the up to Bend and beyond. 

We just have to keep letting Him lead.

Summary of miracles

After a long battle for healing and then having it end in surgery, there has to be a way of returning to hope in the Lord, processing all that you've experienced and allowing Him to minister hope to your soul again.

We were reviewing all the things that didn't happen.

#1 - I didn't have any trouble with surgery. It went faster and smoother than expected. They said up to 4 hours of surgery, it only took 2. They were concerned with Spinal meningitis being a possibility if the tumor had affected the spinal column and they had to tap into that then there would be spinal fluid leakage and they would take some fat from my belly (lovely) and "plug" that hole. None of that happened! 

The surgeon was able to get a good look around inside because of this new technology of endoscopic procedure that he was more confident that ever that he got it all. He said the tumor had grown around the carotid artery but that he was able to dissect around the area and was confident he got all.... something he wouldn't have been able to do last year with the old procedure.

#2 - Recovery was much quicker than they expected. There is a risk of something called "diabetes insipidous" long term for when the body doesn't turn the liquid you drink into urine, but just passes it thru.... I did not have that!!!

#3 - They were astounded at the lack of pain. They kept trying to give me vicadin, something I hate to take because I feel so loopy on it. I was able to take Tylenol with great affect. 

#4 - early discharge. Way earlier than I expected.

The only sadness for me was that they had to cut off my rings during surgery. When I woke up in post op Daniel told me they had to cut them off for fear of hurting my hand if it got swollen during surgery. Amazingly though they cut it with just one clip on both rings and they seem easily fixed.

For now I'm resting. No limitation of what I can eat or drink. I do have to be careful not to do things like clean my house and drive... guess I'll have to be pampered for a few days :o) 

Thank you all for praying. After a year of prayer being invested into this season not just by us but by most of you, I am astounded at God's goodness! He loves us and He is caring for us with astounding care. He has been so near and already I can feel my body returning to normal. 

I love you all so much and am so grateful for all of your love and prayers. Looking forward to more miracles to come!

Friday Jan. 10th

When I woke up on Friday I had two thoughts. First was that I slept much better than the night before, my thirst was not as excruciating as it had been. and the second was that if they didn't take these tubes out of me I was going to rip them out myself. I just laid there and prayed that they would let me come home that day. Check out is by 11 am. 

At 6 am they came in and said everything looked great. I had no complications whatsoever and all the tests looked good. They encouraged me that they would take the tubes out soon.

By 8 am they were asking me if I wanted to go home. After a hearty "YES" they began getting my papers in order and promised to try to get me out by noon. 

By 9 am they had the tubes out and I was able shower and do a few tests that would prove I was able to go home that day.

By 10:30 we were driving home!!!

Arrived home at 12:30pm..... Just astounding. Got to spend the rest of the day with my kids and parents and after a long day went to bed early.... 8pm!

Thursday Jan. 8th

When I woke up on Thursday I already could feel improvement. Even though the night had been very interrupted, I felt clearer and stronger.

My parents brought the boys up to see me and they weren't sure what to do. They were pretty shocked to see me in bed with a giant bruise on my forehead, but the warmed up quickly and enjoyed seeing the room.

The surgeon came in. He said the tumor itself came out very very easily. It was rather soft and he was able to get a good look around without much trouble. He was very confident that they had gotten it all. I am still amazed that there could be that much activity in my head and I don't even have a headache!!! I expected to feel pretty rotten for quite a while. My eyes were tired and my nose feels like I have a really stuffy nose, but that is it! I can already feel the pressure gone behind my eyes that I lived with for so long.....

By breakfast I was able to eat cereal, an egg and some muffins..... I napped just briefly a couple of times that day, but other than that I felt amazing. Didn't get to get up at all until later that night, began getting sick of the tubes, especially the catheter and the drip line in my arm. All in all I had a couple of tylenol that day but felt sooo much better.

Every nurse I had, every doctor, even the janitors who came to the room and the transport technicians, everyone, without exception was so kind and gracious and compassionate. I have not seen or heard of that kind of kindness and care ever!!! It was extraordinary!

Wednesday Jan.7th

I thought I'd blog day by day about the surgery so you can see the hand of the Lord from the beginning all the way thru.

So Daniel and I went down to LA on Tuesday evening. We left the boys with Daniel's family for the night and they were pretty oblivious as to why we were leaving, but were thrilled to be staying with Papa, Nana and Uncle Jon (Daniel's brother who came all the way from Seattle just to be with us for the surgery.)

After a yummy Chinese food dinner we got stuck in traffic for an extra hour or so which made us so grateful that we don't live in LA anymore!!!! DON'T miss the traffic! When we got to our hotel we were a bit disheartened by the outside and the lobby, but were surprised when we reached the room. A big room with two big beds that were very comfortable and a big tub with jets!!! I got to take an amazing bath that helped me sleep way better than I expected to.

In the morning we got up early (5 am) so that we could get up and get to the hospital for a 6 am check in. We were close enough to be able to walk to the hospital. When we woke up we were both in a state of shock. We felt like we were walking around but mere zombies. So surreal to actually be doing something we had been only wondering about for over a year, something we never imagined we'd ever have to do.

So after we got checked in we were asked to sit in the waiting room which is full of other patients and their family members all preparing for surgery at the same time. As I was looking around I was wondering about everyone's stories. People who looked perfectly healthy, ones who looked like they were hanging on to life by a thread.... the only way to know who was a patient and who was a family member was the white wristband they gave to the ill...... Soon I got my own wristband and filed into the waiting room with the other "zombie-like" people.

After a few minutes of waiting we were ushered to the second floor where they lead us to a cubicle, asked me to undress, put on a gown...... that is when it hit us. We both started to cry and allowed ourselves to feel the heaviness of the situation. Soon we had people buzzing about. After about an hour of answering the same questions: are you allergic to anything, do you drink, do you smoke, are you pregnant, etc..... we numbly answered all of them and whispered how much we loved each other. For me I felt like I was going to the death chamber. I have never faced anything that scary in my life. Brain surgery! I didn't know if I would come out with normal brain function, if I would come out with my vision, I didn't know if I would come out at all! The gravity of the moment was not lost on us, we were terrified and I was so grateful my sweet husband, best friend and rock was there with me. He steadied me thru all of it.

As the anesthesiologist came and poked me numerous times, trying to get the vein which kept collapsing because I had been fasting with only sips of water since dinner time the night before, I knew this was just the beginning of all the poking and prodding. Finally he gave me a drug that made me feel relaxed and told Daniel he could walk with me. I was so scared, Daniel kissed me one more time and we prayed together, he told me he would see me in just a bit and they rolled me thru the doors. It felt like a TV show... weird, just weird. We went into the OR and they had me move from one bed to the operating table. I said hi to the surgeon and then my hearing began getting cloudy.

The next thing I remember I was being told to wake up. My limbs each felt like they were strapped to 500 pound weights and I kept thinking "this is just a dream, it has to be a dream, this can't be happening to me..." I could barely open my eyes and the strongest sensation was overwhemling thirst. I had a giant gauze bandage on my nose and an oxygen mask. They kept asking me questions like "what is your name, where are you, what is the date".... I was able to answer all of them.

Finally they allowed Daniel to come in and see me, after about 2 1/2 hours of waiting. When I saw him I was so relieved. He looked wonderful. I guess I had a pretty huge bruise on my forehead. They had to stabilize my head and it left a bruise, other than that I had no bruising whatsoever, my nose wasn't even tender. They took me up to my room and the rest of the day was filled with blood tests, MRI's and lots of looking at the inside of my eyelids. I heard most everything, but couldn't open my eyes much.

My parents came up to see me briefly and Daniel got to stay with me  in my room.... it was such a long day and all night they monitored me closely with lots of needle pokes and blood pressure cuffs and urine samples and IV drips.. but the absolute worst part was the unquenchable thirst. All that day and all I drank cup after cup and ended up drinking well over a gallon of water in about 9 hours.

 

Update On Surgery

Today we went into UCLA medical at 6:00 AM and at 8:30 AM I left my sweet wife in the hands of the surgeon and the LORD.  At 10:30 AM they made the first incision.  Two hours later the surgeon found me waiting in the court yard to give me the news.  He told me that thinks he was able to remove the entire tumor.  Thank you Father God!  After a day of painful waiting finally at 3:00 PM I was allowed to see my wife and touch her beautiful face.  7:30 PM she is asleep and all is well.  Thank you everyone for your prayers.

Tomorrow

I told Daniel I feel like I'm preparing for a wedding, only not as happy. Things to arrange, billions of phone calls, schedules to coordinate etc, etc....

Looks like Daniel and I will be going down today. We will be staying in a hotel near the hospital and I think we will have a 5 am check in at the hospital. We have Daniel's parents here to take care of the boys and his brother Jon arrived last night. My parents are driving down today and will arrive around the time of surgery tomorrow. 

The boys still seem to be a bit oblivious... although Ethan is more of my "feeler" and he has been more quiet than normal. We are trying to make this fun though for them. Keep things as normal as possible. They are excited to be with Papa tonight and tomorrow and then to be with my parents tomorrow.

I will have Daniel update this blog tomorrow after surgery so that everyone can stay up to date. We would appreciate it if you would stay updated here, if you need to call please call one of our family members that you know. We need to keep our phone clear for family calls and Dr's to get thru to Daniel if they need to. Thank you for that. If you are family, feel free to call.

Looking forward to being brand new ;o)

Waiting

We are taking care of last minute things here at home today. Daniel's brother Jon flies in later today and my mom should be here in the next day or two!!! Yay!!! Anyway, I'm keeping very close to the phone, I'm waiting for the Dr's office to call and give all the details I need before surgery. I hate waiting!!!! 

Weird to think we are just about 48 hours out from surgery.... unbelievable even. I'm actually anticipating having all this over, that is basically all I can think about. 

I had a wonderful time with the Lord yesterday. I stayed home from church and went to a park for a couple of hours. The Lord ministered Isaiah 30:15 to me yesterday. He is having me fast from negativity for the next few days before surgery. I get side tracked with negativity especially when I'm tired and overwhelmed. I'm happy to be fasting that.

More news as we receive it.

Happy New Year

I am so glad we've leaped into a new year!!! I couldn't be happier that 2008 is over. I don't ever remember wishing a year goodbye as heartily as I said goodbye to last year. 

I think my favorite thing about last year is all the traveling I did with Daniel. We got away by ourselves more last year than at any other time and for that I am grateful. I also got into contact with an extraordinary number of people from my past in the last year. Most of it was not something I orchestrated either which I think was interesting. All that made my year nice..... 

However, I have high hopes for 2009!!!

We are down to 3 days before surgery. Yes, I am feeling mixed emotions. Apprehension is increasing for sure. I find myself much more sensitive than normal and overwhelmed much easier than usual. I know it is just the extra emotion of the season. I've never experienced anything like this before. We have both received a peace about the surgery itself. I know I will come thru it just fine, the care I will receive is supposed to be the best, for all that I am grateful. As I mentioned before my heart is a bit sick though. Please be praying for me in that.

Daniel is officially off for 2 weeks now. His brother Jon flies in on Monday to be with us for the surgery and to get a chance to pray with us and for us before hand.... I'm so grateful for his thoughtfulness in coming, it will really help.

We will find out more details on Monday I imagine. For now, thank you for praying. We'll keep everyone posted.